i’m not okay



But we have to learn to be free. We have to, Nell. Doesn’t mean happy
all the time, or okay all the time. It’s okay not to be okay. I told
you that, but I’m relearning it myself. But not being okay doesn’t
mean you stop living.”
― Jasinda Wilder, Falling into You

How are you?

I am sure you have heard that question a lot and automatically answer  “I’m Ok”.

In many societies, there is a stigma surrounding not feeling ok as if it is taboo to be real.  Many of us were raised to believe that it was wrong to speak about your misfortune and ill feelings, and while I understand the intention, I do not understand why we must lie about our true feelings.

Especially now, given the current global state of a haunting pandemic that has redefined normality; it is ok to not feel ok.  What is happening can even be considered traumatizing for many people who have been impacted by COVID-19. Some people have lost their jobs, others may have lost a loved one to the disease, many of us had to cut out or socializing activities and were told we should not be hugging each other. I don’t know about you but I am not ok about the entire ordeal. It is scary, confusing, and the longer it lasts the more unreal it feels.

And please, do not fall victim to the trends of what I like to refer to as “positive toxicity”; pretending to be overly optimistic and happy about everything that is going on around you. The Psychology Group has a great post about ‘Positive Toxcitiy’ and like Samara Quintero, LMFT, CHT, and Jamie Long, PsyD put it “ We define toxic
positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience. Just like anything done in excess, when positivity is used to cover up or silence the human experience, it becomes toxic”.

Speak Trauma is all about, well you guessed it; SPEAKING OUT! About everything that does not feel ok because unresolved trauma that resides within you can impact your mental, physical, and spiritual wellbeing. If we want to move forward collectively as an inspiring generation; one that seeks to build bridges and heal one another, then
we need to speak out about our past misfortunes, our traumas. Have a story to share? Please drop us a line in the comments so others can be encouraged to speak out too!